I'm aware two months is a very long time but hello :)
Today I wanted to talk about a friendship that has had an extremely large impact in my life this last year. I was friends with this guy, I might even dare to use the words best friends. We saw each other every single day and when we didn't see each other we would talk on the phone for hours, all the good stuff. My biggest problem with him was that I never actually felt like I meant that much to him. He meant a lot to me, he was my best friend after all, but it just seemed so easy for him to ditch me for his other, friends. Friends he had known for a longer time. The thing about me is, if I don't have somebody's undivided attention I feel left out. If you knew me, you'd know that I'm cool enough to deserve that. <--Self love, we gotta have it folks :)
So we were friends for about two years and this summer, a week after my graduation (he's a year younger than I) we got in our 683rd fight. This was not like any other fight we had been in before, the details are unimportant. the sparknotes version is that he ended the call telling me to forget about him. I was devastated. My best friend during the latter half of high school had just told me he wanted nothing to do with me. It was extremely difficult for me to understand the natural cycle of friendships because this had never happened to me before (Like I said before, I'm pretty awesome)
I spent the whole summer thinking about him everyday, going into stalker mode, sending texts, snapchats, facebook messages...even emails. All were lead to no response. I couldn't be in my house without thinking about him. My room was the worst place because that's where I had gotten the news. I kept myself distracted during the day by hanging out with my other friends, it worked...for a while.
I went off to college and sent him a final message. No response. The thoughts started decreasing, I'd only think about him a couple times a week as opposed to a couple times a day. And then about two months ago I saw that I had a voicemail on my phone. It was my best friend who had abandoned me. I had no idea how to respond, my life had been virtually drama free up until that point. I returned his call because he meant a lot to me. We talked for a while and I believe by the end of the conversation we decided to be friends again....That's what I thought.
The friendship is completely different now. I'll text him occasionally and he'll respond even less frequently. It's just the weirdest thing in the world. Going from talking to somebody all day everyday to barely being able to send a couple of messages back and forth. It still hurts my heart to think about.
Even though this situation has probably provided me with the most confusion in my life, I am extremely grateful for it. It has taught me that not everything will turn out the way you expect it to. Relationships with other people will change and you literally can't control it. You just have to go along for the ride and see where it takes you.
That's the something about friendship. There's something worthwhile in every single one, no matter how deep, no matter how long. There's something they can teach you, just be patient for the lesson to come.
PS- I realize that I have probably painted my friend to be quite the douchebag in this post but just remember, there are two sides to every story and I wouldn't want to discredit his.
